Eating habits in children and teens
"Food fight" takes on a whole new meaning when it comes to families. With young children, you may be battling over what they eat, as they resist some foods and plead for others. With teens, food issues may relate to how much they eat, as they struggle with body image and a desire to look a certain way.
At its most basic, food is the fuel to help us grow, develop, heal, move, and learn. It can also be a way for families to connect, honor their culture, and interact with others. There are things you can do to encourage healthy eating and a healthy relationship with food, based on your child's developmental stage. If, however, your child struggles with food and eating and you are concerned about their physical and emotional health, a clinical professional may be able to help.
Learn more about eating habits at your child’s age
Eating habits in preschool and school-age children
It’s common for children to be fussy eaters, unwilling to try new foods, quick to reject others, or focused on old favorites. Typically, children are less picky as they get older. Some children may have little interest in food, and others may be overly interested, to the point of overeating.
What can I do?
To encourage healthy eating habits:
- Choose the foods you want your child to eat, and give them opportunities to eat
- Try to establish a predictable routine for meals and snacks
- Ensure pleasant, low-stress mealtimes
- Be a role model through your own good eating habits
- Have fun with new foods. Your child may need to be exposed to a food many times before deciding whether they like it
- Invite your children to help with age-appropriate activities in the kitchen to encourage interest in food and healthy eating
- Turn off distractions during meals
- Don’t worry too much about spills and messes
Your child’s doctor can help you determine whether your child is eating too much. If your child needs to eat less, you can:
- Serve smaller portions. If your child is still hungry after eating, allow a small second helping after giving your child time to feel full. It takes 20 minutes for the brain to send the body signals of fullness after a person starts eating
- Avoid electronic screens, toys, and other distractions during meals so your child focuses on their appetite
- Don’t offer more of a preferred food if your child refuses part of the meal, like vegetables. Instead, let your child choose not to eat
If you and your child’s doctor are concerned that they aren’t eating enough, you can:
- Ensure consistent mealtimes to help teach your child’s body when to feel hungry
- Serve smaller and fewer snacks so your child doesn’t feel full at mealtimes
When should I be concerned?
Reasons for concern about your child’s eating habits include:
- Significant weight gain or loss
- Lack of growth
- Extreme dislike of certain tastes or textures
- Tantrums related to food
- Worry about body image that causes them to not eat
- Fear of stomach aches
- Hiding, hoarding, or sneaking food
- Thinning of hair
- Constipation or digestion problems
Where can I get help?
- Talk to your child’s pediatrician about your experience and for guidance
- Contact Ohana at (831) OHANA01
While eating disorders are more common among teens and adults, they can start in school-age children (ages 6–11), and require prompt medical attention.
Eating habits in teens
Puberty is a time of rapid growth and development, meaning teens need more food to fuel them. At the same time, most teens are concerned about how they look and how others see them, an age-old pressure that’s become even more heightened by social media. Teens spend hours every day on their screens, scrolling through picture-perfect images most can never match.
What can I do?
As teens gain independence, they more often choose what to eat. But as a parent, you can still influence them by:
- Serving as a role model for healthy eating and talk about food in a positive way (no “good foods” or “bad foods”)
- Stocking your home with nutritious items from different food groups (fruits, vegetables, grains, protein, and dairy)
- Inviting your teen to help plan meals, shop for groceries, and cook
- Focusing on health and the whole person rather than body image; don’t criticize their weight or appearance
- Having predictable mealtimes (your teen may be too busy to make them, but having the option is still helpful)
- Ensuring that mealtimes are pleasant, low-stress, and free of distractions like screen use
- Avoiding criticism of what your teen eats; providing diverse, healthy options is a more positive way to help them make better choices
When should I be concerned?
You should be concerned if your teen:
- Is overly critical about their size, shape, or weight, and worried or upset about changes
- Compares their body and appearance to others more often
- Loses or gains weight unexpectedly or at an unusual rate
- Checks their weight more frequently
- Obsesses over dieting (counting calories, tracking carbs and fat)
- Starts extreme exercise or workouts
- Hides or sneaks food
- Skips meals
- Becomes significantly more focused on dress and grooming, or, conversely, cares a lot less about dress and grooming
- Avoids activities because of how they feel about their body or appearance
- Has physical changes such as hair thinning or missed periods
Where can I get help?
- Talk to your teen’s doctor
- Contact Ohana at (831) OHANA01
If your teen is struggling with eating issues, they are far from alone. A recent study found that about 1 in 5 teens may struggle with “disordered eating” — something between “normal” eating and a diagnosable eating disorder. Girls are affected at an even higher rate. Medical professionals can assess your teen to determine where they may be on that spectrum, the causes, related issues, and the best treatment options.
The most common eating disorders are:
- Anorexia — Eating very little, weighing themselves repeatedly, and expressing dread of gaining weight, even if they’re underweight
- Avoidant restrictive food intake disorder (ARFID) — Severely limiting the amount or type of food eaten, but without having a distorted body image or intense fear of weight gain
- Bulimia nervosa — Eating unusually large amounts of food and then compensating by forced vomiting, overuse of laxatives or diuretics, excessive exercise, or a combination
- Binge-eating — Recurring episodes of eating very large amounts of food
Eating disorders can be life-threatening, so getting treatment is critical. Typically, treatment includes individual and family therapy, working with doctors and nutritionists, and medication.
Ohana uses a range of treatments that are based on evidence and experience. We know that no two families are alike and choose the best options for you, after an assessment of your child and family. Learn more about our treatment approaches.
